Restraint of pen and tongue was a foreign concept to me before I entered the program. Instead, I was impetuous and acted on feelings of jealousy, fear, anger or hurt pride. Fueled by resentment, it was easy for me to justify my actions and ignore the repercussions and reactions of others. When I got into the rooms I was at odds with most people and alienated even from myself. My life had become unmanageable.
When I began working the steps, I learned to take the focus off what other people were doing to me, and look at my own behaviour instead. It was hard at first not to stop reacting to the many perceived wrongs I felt people were doing to me, but when I finally learned to put a space between what I felt and how I reacted, my life began to dramatically improve.
Today, I’ve come to rely on the wisdom and miracles that can happen between my thoughts and my subsequent actions. Time after time, situations will automatically clear themselves up if I only wait, pray on them and turn them over. I am much less likely to become excited or agitated, and I’m much less likely to make things worse if I can pause before I react.
Today I’ve learned that before I do something stupid, I should wait at least 24 hours.
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