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A Partner’s Language

For Women: 25 common mistakes that can alienate the man in your life.

  • Exclude him from important decisions.
  • Correct what he says.
  • Question his judgment.
  • Give unsolicited advice.
  • Dismiss his opinion.
  • Imply inadequacy.
  • Make unrealistic demands of his time and energy.
  • Overreact.
  • Ignore his desires.
  • Focus on what you didn’t get, rather than what you got.
  • Withhold praise.
  • Use a harsh tone.
  • Be abrupt – spring things on him.
  • Undermine his wishes.
  • Condescend.
  • Criticize his personality.
  • Disrespect his work.
  • Show little or no interest in his interests.
  • Criticize his family.
  • Interpret, psychoanalyze, or diagnose him.
  • Make comparisons to other men.
  • Focus on your unhappiness.
  • Put friends before him.
  • Value others’ needs over his.
  • Rob him of the opportunity to help.

For Men: 25 common mistakes that can alienate the woman in your life.

  • Ignore her.
  • Tell her what to do.
  • Be short with your answers.
  • Tune out her feelings.
  • Stonewall or give her the cold shoulder.
  • Take her for granted.
  • Limit or criticize her spending.
  • Tell her to stop worrying.
  • Tell her she’s making too much of ____.
  • Tell her to get over ____.
  • Tell her she talks too much.
  • Complain about her weight.
  • Criticize her family.
  • Withdraw or shut down.
  • Yell or get angry.
  • Pout or sulk.
  • Threaten to quit your job.
  • Flirt with other women.
  • Ignore her dreams.
  • Tell her she’s just like her mother.
  • Complain about her women friends.
  • Give her the cold shoulder.
  • Dismiss her ideas.
  • Sound like you’re trapped in the marriage.
  • Buy a sports car.